Yes, you heard me. Stop seeking perfection in everything you do. It will lead to your ruin.
How so?
I will start with my story. I have wanted to create a website, YouTube channel, speak about self development and do more with my life. I would sit down, plan everything with unscrupulous detail and never engage the next step. I was lost in the seeking of perfection to even attempt to start something new.
It took me four attempts to finally decide to actually register the website. Every time I would get to the checkout, the thoughts of doubt would swirl around in my head. What if it was not good enough? What will I write about? Will anyone even read it? Endless thoughts of self-doubt and perfection seeking effectively held me back. My entire life has always been self doubt, or double checking, triple checking, researching everything I can about something endlessly until I make no decision and do it all again next time.
This year I decided enough is enough, I either do it or I don’t. You learn by doing things, making mistakes, and learning from them. I have been much more forthright in making decisions quicker about things. Either they will work perfectly, or something will come up and I will make the best of it, or it becomes evident that it doesn’t work at all. Every single outcome provides a lesson to be learnt, every outcome is a step forward. Inaction means that nothing changes, you don’t leave the starting line whilst everyone else is at least trying.
But! I am not saying blindly take the plunge. You must at least spend some time on the decision. There are a few decisions I make before say purchasing something:
- Do I need this item?
- Do I have similar items like this already?
- If I do already have those items, can I adapt them to suit my needs?
Most of the time my answer to number 1 is no, which shuts everything else down. Other decisions may take longer. It took me all of 30 seconds to decide on the website theme. Maybe in a year’s time I will find something that suits the website better, but for now it works for me. I have decided whenever a new blog topic comes into my head, I will immediately write a post about it. Planning makes me even more confused on the content. But once I start, the words just begin to flow and most of the time I am happy with the content. Perhaps when I think about it several days later or re-read it, I may make minor changes to the flow or grammar.
Let me ask you this. Everything you have ever started, were you any good at it the first time you did it?
No.
Yes! Exactly! Through practise and an iterative process did you improve. The first time I went to the gym, I was so weak that my friend had to make sure I didn’t crush myself with the barbell. Embarrassed and awkward as I was I persisted and was able to build strength. Like everything else in life, you will start out badly as you learn the ropes, build your confidence, train your brain to become more efficient, and actually get used to it.
I’ll give you another example, reading. I kept buying all the books, and the bookshelves. I kept saying to myself, now is not the perfect time to read. Once I have sorted out x, y, and z in my life can I start reading with the perfect form and right focus. Did you think I ever did start to read? Like hell I did. In the end out of frustration, I grabbed a random book (Hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy) and starting reading by force. The rest is history.
I’ve recently started my own business after telling myself I’ll do all of last year. I eventually did it, and it was a struggle, but everyday is a learning opportunity, I know I will make mistakes with running the business, the finances, and filing for my taxes. But with everyday, I can learn and adapt to make each day a little easier.
You simply have to start, even if it is badly. You future self will thank you for it.
See you next time
Faz